I have been able to connect recently with a couple of single women, who have an urge to have sex. But really, our hormones are telling us to. It's how we are made. Particularly when women's bodies sense it is a safe environment to be pregnant (e.g. they aren't being chased by animals or scavenging for food, their stress is lowered, the weather is optimal), hormones surge telling us we should have babies, which obviously means we should be having sex. I think men's probably stays at a more consistent level because their bodies tell them to populate a planet, and well, infant and child mortality was high so it's nature's numbers game. In any case, one woman was a bit ashamed. I told her some of the above and other matter-of-fact information. When she heard that she is supposed to desire and want sex because it is good and a gift but also her body is just doing what it is supposed to be doing, she seemed so relieved and validated. I was able to relate to both women my experience of life as a "slightly older" (oh. my. gosh. I am old enough that sharing life is sometimes from the perspective of my years of experience. And these are adult women, even!) single woman.
We talked a lot about the whole not having sex thing, but this post is really about shared experience in times of struggle, failure, distress, worry, etc. and not shying away from tricky topics. We all have had experiences that were difficult and obviously we typically wish we were not dealing with our issue. But the time you deal with whatever-it-is really does provide an opportunity to build character, through patience and perseverance. Sometimes it softens our hearts or increases our gratitude when we have passed to the other side of the issue. And sometimes our experiences give us the ability to comfort and encourage another in her struggles and desires. Now I try to share openly and willingly when it seems helpful and appropriate so that another may be encouraged and feel comforted and supported. May we never lose such sight of having been somewhere that our lives become irrelevant and detached from others.
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. For just as we share abundantly in the sufferings of Christ, so also our comfort abounds through Christ. If we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which produces in you patient endurance of the same sufferings we suffer. And our hope for you is firm, because we know that just as you share in our sufferings, so also you share in our comfort. --2 Corinthians 1:3-7